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How a Man Can Skip Out On A Wacko Woman
By Harry Hanks
When one finds himself involved too deep into a relationship, and is afraid of being retaliated against by a spurned woman, follow these steps. First, make sure you have the person's email address for the Dear John letter(s), for this method of contact is quick, easy, and almost untraceable. Much better than using a phone for the first contact step in the instructions, for most men couldn't tell the woman what needs to be told without bursting out laughing. Next, cut off all contact for about 2 to 3 days, or until the unwanted individual starts contacting all of your friends, but hasn't resorted to calling your place of employment. Once you hear that she has been looking around, and asking questions, do you proceed to step 3. Now, you send her an email. In it, tell her about an illegitimate child, and how the mother finally found you, and was starting proceedings in court against you, but not for child support, but for intentionally giving her AIDS. Tell her in the email, that there is no way the previous lover got AIDS from you, for the calendar dates show she had AIDS long before she ever met you, and assure her you had a test that confirmed that you are AIDS free. In 99% of all cases, you will never hear from the unwanted woman again. If the individual still persists in contacting you, and looking for you, and even starts to make trouble, proceed to step 4, in the following paragraph. Find a friend or associate, with a very strong Bronx, or New Jersey accent. Have them call the persistent unwanted lover, and have them ask very pointed questions about your whereabouts. As she answers, and is honestly telling the dastardly sounding friend she doesn't know, have him get more and more irritated, until he flat out tells her she is lying, and covering for your lowlife snitching butt! Then tell him to ask where she lives, and ask her if her mother lives with her, and about that time she should hang up on your friend with the heavy New Jersey accent(he can tell her his name is "Little Joey Soprano"), and more than likely not only will you never hear from her again, you couldn't find her yourself, even if you tried!
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Contributor's Note
The author is in no way affiliated, nor endorses any of the solutions to problems he writes about, and they are intended for entertainment purposes only.
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The copyright for this content entitled "How a Man Can Skip Out On A Wacko Woman" has been specified by the contributor as:
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This intel was contributed by banifid
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May, 2012
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